Frankie,
Remember when you were away from home I would keep a light burning in the house? To find your way home?
Well, I still do, and want to ask you to do the same for Pops and me....Keep your light bright, so we can find you as we die...
Mamadukes

Frankie, we miss you more than words could ever say.....

My first ever canvas painting. Did it at a painting party last night.
Its Griffy, and I wanted to show it to you.

wHY DOES IT FEEL LIKE YOU ABSOLUTELY CANNOT BE GONE?
yOU ARE SUCH A PART OF ME, SO FAMILIAR. I AM HAVING A HORRIBLE TIME TRYING TO WRAP MY HEAD AND HEART AROUND THE FACT THAT YOU ARE....DEAD?! iTS BIZARRE AND UNTHINKABLE. mY FRANKIE? nO. eVEN AS i AM WRITING THIS, i AM SHAKING MY HEAD, LIKE ...NO...NOPE...UH UH.
i FEEL LIKE i AM WAITING FOR YOU TO WALK IN THE DOOR. lIKE i AM WAITING FOR YOU TO COME HOME, SO i CAN TELL YOU THIS OFF THE WALL STORY, OR SHOW YOU SOMETHING I MADE, OR WROTE, OR SAID....I WANT YOU TO SMILE AT ME IN THAT PROUD WAY, LIKE YOU DID WHEN i DID SOMETHING OR SAID SOMETHING THAT TICKLED YOU....iTS LLIKE LIVING IN LIMBO. YOU CANT BE GONE FRANKIE, YOU CANT BE GONE MY LOVE. I JUST DONT KNOW HOW TO GET THROUGH IT. I KNOW ITS REAL, BUT I STILL FEEL LIKE I CAN CALL YOU. OR YOU WILL COME DOWN THE STAIRS....I MISS YOU SO MUCH, MY BOY. I CAN'T BEAR IT.

Monday, January 11, 2016

My hands,
like magnets.

Find the walls
of his room.

I try to sleep.

Brain matter
slips from my ears
to the pillow.

It is
the slow exile
of my soul.

I am slipping
into madness.

I miss him.